Is your behaviour damaging trust?

by George Ambler on Monday, November 24, 2008

Management-issues has a great article that asks the question “Does your behavior damage trust?” and list the following 25 behaviours that contribute to creating mistrust within your team:

  1. You fail to keep your promises, agreements and commitments.
  2. You serve your self first and others only when it is convenient.
  3. You micromanage and resist delegating.
  4. You demonstrate an inconsistency between what you say and how you behave.
  5. You fail to share critical information with your colleagues.
  6. You choose to not tell the truth.
  7. You resort to blaming and scapegoating others rather than own your mistakes.
  8. You judge, and criticize rather than offer constructive feedback.
  9. You betray confidences, gossip and talk about others behind their backs.
  10. You choose to not allow others to contribute or make decisions.
  11. You downplay others’ talents, knowledge and skills.
  12. You refuse to support others with their professional development.
  13. You resist creating shared values, expectations and intentions in favor of your own agenda; you refuse to compromise and foster win-lose arguments.
  14. You refuse to be held accountable by your colleagues.
  15. You resist discussing your personal life, allowing your vulnerability, disclosing your weaknesses and admitting your relationship challenges.
  16. You rationalize sarcasm, put-down humor and off-putting remarks as "good for the group".
  17. You fail to admit you need support and don’t ask colleagues for help.
  18. You take others’ suggestions and critiques as personal attacks.
  19. You fail to speak up in team meetings and avoid contributing constructively.
  20. You refuse to consider the idea of constructive conflict and avoid conflict at all costs.
  21. You consistently hijack team meetings and move them off topic.
  22. You refuse to follow through on decisions agreed upon at team meetings.
  23. You secretly engage in back-door negotiations with other team members to create your own alliances.
  24. You refuse to give others the benefit of the doubt and prefer to judge them without asking them to explain their position or actions.
  25. You refuse to apologize for mistakes, misunderstandings and inappropriate behavior and dig your heels in to defend yourself and protect your reputation.

 

Looking at the above list how are you doing? Are you creating or destroying trust?

 

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Related posts:

  1. David Maister on the Four Dimensions of Trust
  2. Behaviours that create or break trust…
  3. David Maister on Trust
  4. Factors that leaders should manage to encourage trust
  5. How is your Trust Rating?

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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Mike King Tuesday, November 25, 2008 at 5:15

Love this list. It’s scary to see it so exhaustive as clearly this happens everyday in most workplaces. Trust is one of those things that the list to break it is unfortunately, very long. Luckily, a few small things consistently can build it quickly though as well.

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2 Ronald Baro Friday, February 13, 2009 at 10:00

I Love this list also. It will help me to become a good bandleader. A leader should also have Charisma and not be a Bully. I hope to be able to use this site.

BAROSALSA

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3 Small Business Marketing Friday, February 20, 2009 at 10:45

This list just covers about everything in relationships in the workplace and even in private life.

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4 Chris Lilley Monday, March 9, 2009 at 21:53

The list is a more granular and fairly comprehensive treatment of a 3 item list I learned years ago from a professor. It addressed the topic from the opposite perspective.
The three things necessary to build trust.
1) be trustworthy (do what you say you are going to do)
2) be trusting (give folks the benefit of the doubt ….while being aware)
3) be accurate (and when you’re not, correct it promptly)
This short list has served me well and your list has given me pause to reflect. Thanks

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5 Spencer Saturday, April 18, 2009 at 6:30

After reading your list, I believe I am trusted by those I lead. We are a tight group and make sure we get each others back when needed.

On the other hand, my boss thinks he is a high performance individual who is respected and trusted. Wrong! In meetings he never makes eye contact. It feels like he is professing greatness while staring at a wall instead of his valued people. I could replace him and he would never be missed.

Until we help him gain confidence and look us in the eye, he is just an also ran as a boss.

Reply

6 loral Sunday, April 19, 2009 at 7:55

Excellent list. I thought these traits were important criteria in judging trust-ability. Now it’s here in plain language. I’ll use this to make sure I’m on track.

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7 Randy Friday, April 24, 2009 at 0:46

Great list. I completely agree, especially with everyone’s comments. Quick to judge is something you see everywhere personally and in the business world. I think more people need to read this. Actually, I think more people need to LIVE this.

Happy Business Everyone!

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